HAVE A HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!!

Tonight it will just be my bf and I having a quiet evening together. I made a simple dinner and we'll eat it together and make a toast and all that junk.

I hope we can watch Fellowship as well as Two Towers! Should be a good night....

well today is the last day of the year.
What a year!
I totally enjoyed 2003. It was full of a lot of good stuff but not too much bad stuff.
I am ready for what the new year will bring!

Last night AGAIN just proved to me that I am with the man of my dreams. I hate the arguments that we have but I like when we make up!
:)

FUCK!

Well I went to bed real late because there was a marathon of "soul food". I had to watch it.
Terry was involved with Damon. She saw this man through real hard times eh, believed in him when he was getting real hell from his father. Yuh know he left her??? and they were about to get married!!!
There was a part in the show where they were talking about realising when you have something good you must fight for it.
I admit I am a fighter. I wouldnt let something I have good die..usually it's the other party who doesnt want to fight. :(
But I was better off for it!
Damon just left. He said it wasnt working and left.
SOB!

*sigh*
I'm alone again. Yuh know I was fine all the time. Then my bf came and spent a few nights and now it's like I dont like being here by myself. My brother will be back here next week, but fuh now, I am enjoying having my bf stay with me off and on
He's great company to watch TV with and eat with, and having him in the bed is much better than my radio.

I was reading the Christmas cards he gave me:

" I know in my heart this is what love is

Everybody always said " when it's love, you'll just know."

But for a long time, I never really understood what that meant....

UNTIL YOU.

I cried when I read that yuh know.

*sigh* I miss you.

Watching biographies is a past time of mine. I like to see that there are a lot of people going through pain, just like me or even worse. It makes me realise that I am not alone.
I watched the biographies of Elizabeth Broderick who killed her ex husband and his new, younger wife in their sleep; Amy Fisher who tried to kill her lover's wife; and Mary Kay Letourneau who had a sexual relationship with her 13 y. o. student.

On the offset, these look like heinous crimes, but when you hear their background, what happened in their childhood, it does not excuse, but explain their actions.
Of course the one about the teacher really struck home. I'm 24 and the thought is like *yuck*. She was 34, married with 4 children.

For her,she thought he was a man because he was going throught a rough family situation. The one thing he did was listen to her; he listened to her when no one else would, not even her husband, and that was all she needed.

gosh..I feel so lazy today.
*bleh*

I was just looking at Triumph the insult dog and this cigar. WHY dont they just make it so that it doesnt drop out? It's always dropping out!!

Reading TS and the HOFs I realise that there are a lot of unhappy people about. I mean, I know about life being tough.
HELL YEAH I know about that!

But you know what? Someone has it harder than you.
Someone is out on the streets, someone just lost a family member, someone found out they have a terminal disease....

Prayer always got me through my trials. And I would recommend that to anyone.

When you really love someone- Alicia Keys

I'm a woman
Lord knows it's hard
I need a real man to give me what I need
Sweet attention, love and tenderness
When it's real, its unconditional
I'm telling ya’ll
Cause a man just ain't a man if he ain’t man enough

To love you when you're right
To love you when you're wrong
Love you when you're weak
Love you when you're strong
Take you higher when the world got you feeling low
He's giving you his last, cause he’s thinking of you first
Giving comfort when he's thinking that you're hurt
That's what's done when you really really love someone
I'm telling ya’ll, I'm telling ya’ll

Cause you're a real man
And Lord knows it's hard
Sometimes you just need a woman's touch
Sweet affection, love and support
When it's real its unconditional
I'm telling ya’ll, oh
Cause a woman ain't a woman if she ain’t woman enough

To love you when you're right
To love you when you're wrong
Love you when you're weak
Love you when you're strong
Take you higher when the world got you feeling low
She's giving you her best, even when you’re at your worse
Giving comfort when she's thinking that you're hurt
That's what's done when you really love someone
I'm telling ya’ll, I'm telling ya’ll
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

It don't make sense but it makes a good song
Cause a man just ain't a man if he ain’t man enough

To love you when you're right
To love you when you're wrong
Love you when you're weak
Love you when you're strong (Love when you when you’re strong)
(Take you high’a) when the world got you feeling low
He's giving you his last, cause he’s thinking of you first

Sometimes you're gonna argue, sometimes you're gonna fight
Sometimes it's gonna feel like it'll never be right
But something so strong keeps you hold’n on

Giving comfort when he's thinking that you're hurt
That's what's done when you really love someone
I'm telling ya’ll, I'm telling ya’ll
I'm tellying ya’ll that a woman ain't a woman if she ain’t woman enough
(To love ya!)
Love you when you're right
Love you when you're wrong
(To hold ya!)
Love you when you're weak
Love you when you're strong
Take you higher and higher
when the world got you feeling low
She's giving you her best, even when you’re at your worse (even when you’re at your worst, BABYBA!)
Giving comfort when she's thinking that you're hurt
That's what's done when you really love someone
I'm telling ya’ll, I'm telling ya’ll

Merry Brandybuck If I were a character in The Lord of the Rings, I would be Merry, Hobbit, heir of the Brandybucks and a friend of Frodo's. In the movie, I am played by Dominic Monaghan. Who would you be? Zovakware Lord of the Rings Test with Perseus Web Survey Software

life is good yes!

ROTK WAS REAL GOOD!!!
i eh go lie..it was real good!!!
my baby gave me the lord of the rings books for christmas so I am in my glee for the next few mnths well!!
It also includes "the hobbit'

well I must say that yesterday was one of the best Christmases. I woke up with my bf by my side which was nice. we had breakfast and then opened presents. I got just what I wanted. And he liked his presents too.
YEAH! so I didnt do that bad

one thing that I completely enjoyed was after 2 this morning, just sitting down on his front porch, just talking. I like stuff like that.

hee hee

Today was a good day. I had lots of fun. It was nice and sweet and i was well rested..hee hee..a lil TOO well rested. But sleep is always nice.
my vacation will be over just now so I am trying to make the best of it.

it's hot, everywhere is crowded and i havent gotten all my groceries as yet.
I dont have my family around me; everyone is separated
christmas sucks!!!
but at least i'll be spending it with my baby
yeah!
just the two of us...

last night my bf and I had a "discussion" on religion.
That was the worst!!!
I hated it. I really dont like discussions about religion. One thing is that i dont know enough about mine to defend myself. I am always ahhhmm uuhhmmm..steups whereaas he's just rattling off his stuff.

so..I'm embarking on a quest..to know about my religion and my beliefs.wish me luck!

yuh know, I feel as if I'm back in secondary school. I never used to say much so people just used to walk all over me.

I'm a teacher and I must set an example yuh know. So everything I say and do has to be as PC as possible. I try to do things the right way..but no..people still want to fuck yuh up!

If it's one thing I have always admired about my boyfriend is that he says what is on his mind. I on the other hand hold back..just to be peaceful. But I doh like assholes either..so fuh this new year, yuh will see a new Ayanna.

Dont worry, I wont be fuck up...I still be the same sweet Ayanna you know and love, but i wont take shit lying down. I have education too, but I also have integrity and character. I doh deal up in bacchanal.

well I broke a 12 y. o. heart last night.
He asked me the question: If I LIKE him. I said no, I have a boyfriend. he got very mad and told me not to speak to him, he doesnt like to speak to people who dont like him.
lol

poor ting.....

all I can say is WOW...
one day u r on top of the world, next you're not..

it'a amazing how things are going on while your life is going on. I mean, while I'm online, somebody's life is changing, somebody is losing a family member.

For example, just surfing the net I saw Melissa Rivers filed for divorce on Jone 19 2003. on that date I was home relaxing. Her life was changing.
bah I dont know if I'm making any sense....

heh heh heh
Things are kinda shaping up by me for christmas. One more room to go and I done! YEAH!

well I watched "swimfan" THUMBS DOWN! That movie was shit! WWWAAAAAAAYYYYY!
But of course it taught a valuable lesson :

keep your penis in your pants and everything will be fine!

Seriously, if he had just kept it in, all that would NEVER have happened!

take note eh!

Today is my brother's birthday. He is 19. Yuh know I can remember the day he came home from the hospital like it was yesterday.
Yuh know what I remember? I was 5 when he was born and I remember my aunt was talking about him and said that he was real white and yuh know the image of a "white" baby with blond hair popped into my head. I was very confused. lol

well....let me get back to "a wedding story".

Borrowed this from someone; I like it!

1. What did you do in 2003 that you'd never done before?
I visited the gynocologist

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
cant remember what they are lol

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
One of my co workers

4. Did anyone close to you die?
thank goodness, no.

5. What countries did you visit?
none

6. What would you like to have in 2004 that you lacked in 2003?
more time, more energy

7. What date from 2003 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
September the 13th cause that was when he told me he loved me and we endeavoured on a new journey together

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
starting a course in psychology and counselling

9. What was your biggest failure?
The CXC results of my students

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
no thank God

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My wonderful Dell

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My mother's - she beginning to see that I'm not a lil girl anymore

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
some co workers

14. Where did most of your money go?
loans and friday night limes

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
the start of the new school year

16. What song will always remind you of 2003?
any song off of the meteora album

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? happier
ii. thinner or fatter? neither
iii. richer or poorer? neither

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
studying, planning my work

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
daydream

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
right here in Trinidad

22. Did you fall in love in 2003?
OH YEAH

23. How many one-night stands?
none

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Merge on Lifetime
wedding story/while you were out on TLC

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
no

26. What was the best book you read?
all the Harry Potter books

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Floetry- LOVE that album

28. What did you want and get?
actually, on old years night, i prayed for a good man to come into my life. I had a few yuckies before the real one came along

29. What did you want and not get?
more exercise

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Finding Nemo was real good as well as LXG

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
24; my class threw me a party, but I spent it alone

32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
starting a new class as well as meeting my bf ( sorry that 2 things)

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2003?
a more sophisticated look

34. What kept you sane?
TV, my computer, my bf

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Orlando Bloom, Demi Moore (she looked real good!)

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
the war in iraq as well as the capture of Saddam

37. Who did you miss?
not any one person in particular

38. Who was the best new person you met?
besides my bf, the cool people I have met were online

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2003.
Things happen for a reason.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
cant think of any right now

Yesterday I found my diary from the year 2000 and boy! was I ashamed.
In 2000 i would have been 21. In it, apparently I had a big crush on a guy and I used to write down every time he called or visited, as well as the other guys who called. I wrote once "he said he missed me. What does that mean?" aarrgghh! I cant believe how dumb I was! lol
But it was a good thing I found it because it caused me to call a really good friend of mine. He isnt doing so well and I am very concerned. He's very understanding but I would admit I have neglected him. He's like my big brother. I hope everything works out with him.

it 2am and I'm up..because I slept all day yesterday. I am miserable, my nose is stuffy, I'm sneezing and I have a lil coff..all the dust!
damn...
So i watched as much as I could of that movie, but Taye Diggs' accent was HORRIBLE! He looked good, but he was too annoying.

Crank Yankers is the best!

I'm watching "How Stella Got her Groove back" and hear nah..TAYE DIGGS! Anyway, I heard this song by Mary J Blige called "beautiful" and these are lyrics dedicated to the beautiful one in my life:


So beautiful, you are, yeah
Soooooooo
Yes, you are
You're so...

Beautiful
Now you're near
In my life
Oh my dear

Beautiful
Come to me
Now I have-
Someone watching over me


All my days and nights so lonely
'Til you came into my life
You came and brought my life back to me
Cause I was dying deep inside

You brought the light
And my life was so dark
You took the fight
And you made it your own
I really love you
No other love can measure up
To the love that you give to me
And with all this love comes trust


I opened up my arms to greet you
With unconditional love
Tender sweet is he that helps me
Leave my problems all behind


Baby come to me. You know that I will set you free
Promise it will be an expirience for you and me
Let me take you to a place where there is understanding
Where love flows unselfishly and never ever demanding

Now you're near
In my life
All my fears
Beautiful, Beautiful, yeahh
Come to me
Someone's watching over me

Ooohhh, so beautiful
(If I had a dream, it ould be... so beautiful)
I wanna say... that I love you
Oh, the love you give
All the love you give to me
All my days and nights so lonely
And it's so, soooo beautiful
But now I have a friend that I can talk to, yeah
(If I had a dream, it would be... so beautiful)

You're so beautiful

(Chorus)

You're so beautiful
You are so beautiful
You're so beautiful
You are so beautiful

You're the only love I know
Beautiful
You're the only love I know
Beautiful
You're the reason why I live
Beautiful
You're the reason why I wanna give you everything
(Since you came into my life)

well today was a wasted day. my landlord came at 6 am to fix the dripping pipe. So after he left i was knocked out for the rest of the day.

Now while he was fixing the pipe we were talking about some stuff and it was there I learnt that he went to study dentistry in California. But like he was only too glad for the listening ear because he engaged me in conversation, interesting if I were alert, but I really couldnt listen. His family thinks that he talks too much...

I do concur.

I just cant help think how great yesterday was. Limed with my bf AND limed with friends I have not seen in a while. Both were just cool vibes.
And while I wished he were there with me, it was nice just liming with other people while he had his own cool lime.
It was only in retrospect this morning when I was trying to go to sleep that i realised the only person that I have been liming with for a while now..is him.
Is that good or bad?

well yesterday was a boss day!

It started out kinda bad because I didnt acheive all the tasks I wanted to. But I went to meet my bf and that was the best thing I did. We went to the beach. We bought food and went to take a dip in the salt..well..he did...lol and it was nice.Then we went back home by him and well...yuh know...heh heh heh

Then he did the sweetest thing..I was sitting down and he put on this Luther Vandross song, "I'd rather". He stretched out his hand to me and we danced for a while..we danced to a few other songs. Romantic too bad! a few tears left my eyes..yeah yeah..sappy Ayanna...
So then we went to TGIF..well more like he dropped me off..the lime was nice though, but I had to get back home. I had an early morning so my bf came to pick me up and he dropped me off at home, but I was planning fuh him heh heh heh..he couldnt refuse that..so now here I am typing about it.

I need to go rest..today is a hectic day!

so my last post inspired this marathon conversation last night about our future. Is it too soon to be talking about that? i dunno, but it was a nice conversation.

Cleaning is in the air today but my fav programs are on. *sigh*
by Tuesday I should be relaxing eh??

yeah!
I am finished with school!
Ok so I didnt study so I didnt do as much as I could, but thanks to a skill called ratching i didnt do as bad as I could have.

So at home I watch a lot of TLC.wedding story, dating story, perfect propsal. I just love to see people in love. It so nice!

I did something so lame today: like for wedding story, I imagine it's me and my boyfriend they are following around, talking to our friends. I imagine who is walking me down the aisle, the reception, everything. ( I can see your eyes roll up in your head, baby! LOL)

Yes this is what I was doing instead of studying.

Today is my psychology exam...I should be studying..but see where I am?
On the internet!! LOL
When I fail the exam, yuh would hear meh..woulda shoulda coulda...

Oh yeah..my movie...

"Sweet Home Alabama"....not too interesting. Same old love story yes. Discover that the love you left behind was THE one. Bah....boring.

This weekend is Lord of the Rings weekend! A must see! Yeah!

Earlier I was looking at some cartoons depicting the capture of Saddam and I momentarily felt sorry for the man. The way in which they portrayed him: smelly with lice, drawings of him strung up..I dont know. I felt a tinge of pity for him.
I just always found he was a scapegoat. I dont know all the history between him and the US, but he was just a sorry sight on the news when he was captured.

I will be very glad when they capture Bin Laden! yeah...he is a son of a bitch.
9/11 was a very bad day. I remember watching the footage over and over and over and just wondering what was going the minds of the people when they saw a plane coming towards them. I mean, you went to work....and you..died. I wonder how many of them told their families that they loved them before they left for work.

I try not to hold grudges with people and write them off. Life is too short for shit like that. I get vex, you get vex..we calm down and we go on like normal. But I guess not everyone is like that. I doh have the time to waste like that nah.

Life's like a play: it's not the length, but the excellence of the acting that matters."
-- Seneca

Right now I am watching a show on TLC called "second chance." It's where you get in contact with an ex and see if there still is an chemistry between the both of you as well as bring closure to a relationship that ended abruptly.

When I sat and thought about it, there is no ex that I would want to get in contact with. Things didnt end well..it ended horribly, but I am a true believer of things happening for a reason yes!
In a later post I'll tell you about that. ;)

Is there any ex you would want to bring on this show and why?

Today is my first day of holiday YEAH!
But I have to study..BOO!
and clean..BOO!
Right now I'm watching Jerry Springer and it's amazing that these people who come on here always have a "country" accent and most of their teeth are missing. hmmmmm

oh yeah..i didnt talk about my movie.
I watched "catch me if you can" on Monday. Not the best that Leonardo and Tom Hanks have done, but it was a good watch. Christopher Walken wasnt the proverbial bad guy as he normally is, but he was good.
I love to watch movies with con artists because they are great students of psychology. Frank, the main character, was very good at observing people's habits and knowing which ones to play upon to get what he wants.
Take it in..it's a decent watch.

well i had my exam today.. i must say i wrote a lot. lol hope i do well. I HATE failing.
That assignment that I 'thought" I finished? I just have 6 pages, other people have 12 - 19 pages. Luckily the lecturer didnt come for the assignments tonight so I have more time to look it over.
I have real snacks to eat and I dont know where to begin.
ah yes..life is nice!

Shouldnt love be able to conquer all? When you tell someone you love them and you sincerely mean it, shouldnt that be like a magic word which make things better? I'm a romantic at heart (if you cant tell lol) and I would like to think that loving someone is a strong and powerful emotion, able to work miracles.

I know my baby's love has done wonders in my life. It has made me a stronger, more self confident person.we argue yes and at times it's not nice, but he always tells me that just because he's upset doesnt mean he loves me any less. His love is like magic..... at least to me.

When you love someone who is far away, why cant love bring them closer to you? If you love someone in a different way, why cant people just look at the love that is shared and not look at how different it is?

C and T, my heart goes out to you and your situation. I sincerely hope that it gets better.

I finished my assignment
YEAH!

I just want this week to END! I need to get my cleaning done. I need to relax! I want to just do these exams and end it all!!This is a tough week..hope I make it through.

Today I am sick :(
But I got all my work done FINALLY. It's just to rush down my assignment for tomorrow and cram for my exam.
I really tink I will buss for Christmas. I know my bf will get my some real nice presents and I will just get him the practical stuff.
Wish me luck on my test tomorrow!

oh yeah

and the sex was ORN!!

heh heh heh!

Today was a good day. My baby came over and brought lunch for me and we had a very nice chat, just chatted about us and where things are going. Who says that you have to know someone for a long time in order to love them?? BAH!
We good now..I think stronger than ever.

Yesterday wasnt so good but today made up for it!
:)

baby,
I love you with everything I have. Thanks for being there for me tonight. I feel a lot better but I wish you could have stayed longer.

:(

well I just kinna watched Bourne Identity. It was a decent watch. Matt Damon looked hella sexy boy!! WAAAYYY!!! I think i'll watch it next time it comes on. I wasnt paying too much attention. I was marking papers nah. :)

I also took in "about schmidt" I liked it..well the parts I saw..I was kinna busy nah...

it's so sad looking at Ally Hilfiger buying groceries. I mean it's one thing if you havent had to take care of yourself, but there is something called common sense. If you are going to make burritios and u need to make groceries, at least you find out what u need.

*sigh*

The guy's expression when she was asking him about the beans was priceless
hahahahahahahahaha

Finally..my christmas shopping for my bf is finally OVER! Now it's on to my family..they are easier to shop for.
We are going out tonight and I decided to look like a human being. So I got my eyebrows waxed, my toes and hair done. it was expensive but worth it.

I look pretty!

Love bade me welcome: yet my soul drew back,
Guilty of dust and sin.
But quick-eyed Love, observing me grow slack
From my first entrance in,
Drew nearer to me, sweetly questioning
If I lacked anything.

"A guest," I answered, "worthy to be here":
Love said, "You shall be he."
"I, the unkind, ungrateful? Ah, my dear,
I cannot look on thee."
Love took my hand, and smiling did reply,
"Who made the eyes but I?"

"Truth, Lord; but I have marred them; let my shame
Go where it doth deserve."
"And know you not," says Love, "who bore the blame?"
"My dear, then I will serve."
"You must sit down," says Love, "and taste my meat."
So I did sit and eat.

Now a 12 y o sent me this poem. I dunno nah. No matter how many times I tell him not to like me in that way, he still continues to..but this time he was vehement and he says that nothing will change his mind. His heart is filled with love for me, he likes me with all his heart.
*sigh*

If he were 15years older, he might have given my bf a run for his money. But he is a cute 12 y o. He cute too bad, and bright too. He's in a class with some "bad" boys so I take a special interest in him and a few others to make sure they are on the right path. Dont need to lose any more children.

I dont know what else to tell him nah....
I told him I have a bf..dont seem to faze him.

I went in the mall and as you know it's the end of term, so it was PACKED with school children. I was looking at these children and asking myself if I used to be like that; wearing the skimpiest tops and tightest jeans in the hopes of attracting a cute guy's eye, looking around to see if I knew anybody so I would look as if I knew people. lol

When I was in sec school, I knew I was unpopular and I acknowledged that. I didnt go to any lengths to meet people and hail out people.That just wasnt me. That still isnt me. I know I dont know a lot of people and I'm just fine yes.

well, today was a short day..got up about 10 and reached to work about 12. Lemme tell you, start off the morning right and you will have a good day.

Waking up late is always a good thing for me. I hate getting up early. But then, my bf called and played a song for me; I was blushing! That just put me in a very good mood. I washed my hair and it looked good (for once), then I put on all black and yuh know how black has a slimming effect. I felt so sexy. And this time I did admit to myself that I did look good.
I went to school. we had a lil get together for the revelations of the earthling/angels thing. I got chocolates. *sigh* I am grateful, but yuh know, I like practical stuff. I would not eat a whole box of chocolates.
Then after that I left, went to the mall for a bit, then came home.
I like home. It's cozy.

These days I have been reflecting a lot about my life and where it is right now.

I have a job I like, so work wise I'm happy. I'm independent, I take care of business properly.

Education-I'm satisfied. I have good cxc and A-level results and I have a degree. But I think that I am sticking in terms of my Master's. I am doing this counselling course to get back in the groove of studying and I must admit it's tough so far less for a Master's..wow! And I dont know what I want to do my Master's in anyway

I'm just happy with my bf right now. I have seen a change in him over the past mnths. I didnt insist on it. He did it all on his own and I'm proud of him.

I tell you..the first date we had ended really badly. lol. When I was going home, I was real vex and said never me again nah...but here we are.
We've come a long way! :)

well I did get to talk to my boyfriend..TWICE! Yeah!!

I could talk to him for hours but I cant be selfish, he needs his time to study and rest.

Have you guys ever watch Love connection? I watched yesterday morning and this morning. The weirdest people are on these showers. Then after they show the newly wed game. I wonder how many couples get in an argument from this game.

I would like to talk to my boyfriend but he isnt in such a good mood.
*sigh*

Today I got my first pedicure. It was nice! my toes look pretty!

I dont think I can work in a fast food restaurant or anything. I had to serve food today for our class party and I hated it. Boys just hounding you down for food. bleh....

Listening to Linkin Park now...just right!

This blog should have some emoticons .....

Does your boyfriend's mother like you? I know mine does. hee hee. That is a weight lifted off my shoulders yes. I dont want to do anything to let her down or anything. She really is a sweet person (and NO I'm not just saying that).

My mother hasnt had the pleasure of meeting him as yet. I dont know when she will. I send pics as often as I have them but it's just not the same.

All my friends' parents like me

EXCEPT

my ex boyfriend's mother.

lemme give allyuh the story.
All around this time about two years ago, I went to his house for Christmas. I met his mother and sisters and we were chatting like normal, plying me with food and trying to make me as comfortable as possible. So in my mind I saying to myself , "well cool, they like me," as we all want to be accepted by our SO's family.

anyway, we getting ready to leave to go to a lime or something so, and I was getting up off of my chair and about to say "It was nice meeting you. Enjoy the rest of the season!" This woman will look to ask me "why does my son come home late? It's very dangerous these days and I dont like him coming home at late hours."

Well I was like "what de ass?" and I was stupefied. I didnt know what to say. Luckily he was there and he interjected some thing. Because I tell you, if I had gotten out of my daze, I woulda tell she someting REAL oskell.
b****h!

I love the fact that the two of us never run out of things to talk about. We saw each other yesterday and we talked. And we talked again today too. We can talk for hours. And we did just now.
And TSTT making real money off our backsides. lol

I love the trade off. There are things that I know that I "teach" him about and vice versa. He knows a lot..wow!

*sigh*
I miss him and I saw him just yesterday.

I was contemplating dropping out of the counselling and psychology course that I was doing. I thought it was taking up too much time. But then yesterday I got back my work: 16/20 for the test that I was worried about and 9/10 for an assignment I gave in. heh heh heh

I am so determined to mash up those exams next week. I'll keep you posted

I forgot to add..when the form one boy gave the present I gave him a lil kiss on his cheek. He went back and told his class how I kissed him and another boy wanted to beat him up because HE wanted to give me a present.
lol...I just had to laff yes. They miserable but too sweet yes!
That's why I like teaching boys. Yuh boff dem, but they come back after and talk to you like normal..at least some of them do.

Today was the day I wore my Santa Hat to school. I got the ho ho ho joke twice. lol

Anyway, I got a present from a form one boy "Sung" perfume. From what I heard, it's a brand name perfume. I like it though. It has a very mild scent.
Today was a good day. I laughed a lot which is always a good thing for me. I LOVE to laff!! and you can hear me laffing from a mile away.
Tomorrow is class party. Hear nah, REAL food!!! I will be good yes!
Tomorrow is also the day for my pedicure. I am soooo excited. i have never had one before. hee hee

Right now I have a fever and I dont really feel so good. Hope I feel better soon. I have lots of papers to correct. I am behind schedule. :(

oh yeah. I got my new ID card. Mine was stolen by some ass last year! I feel better using it because I didnt like walking around with my passport. Anyway, if yuh see dat picture. And I have to use that ID till 2013!!
Jeezan!!

dat pic fail!

Today was a boss day: I didnt go to work. YEAH!

I had a few errands to run and so my lovely Bf decided to accompany me. After, we chilled at his house for a while. I really liked that. I tell you, you dont need to passionate, hot steamy sex, although that is ALWAYS good. You can just sit and chat, which is what we did. I needed today because some stuff was stressing me out and his reassurances made me feel a lot better.

Yuh girl decided to take a pass thru Francis Fashions. WELL YES!!! That sale is the best. I got a pair of sandals for 50$ yes! Niceness. I saw Destiny today and we had a nice chat. She went Bishops so she is a cool soldier. I got my eyebrows waxed and I bought lunch and now I am home.

If today taught me anything, it's that TRUE LOVE does exist. It truly does.
*hee hee*

Last night I watched a very impressive movie called "Angels of America" It was set in the 1980s and it dealt with AIDS and the issues surrounding it. Al Pacino played a very impressive character. He played a very high profile lawyer whorubs shoulders with President Reagan(remember it's set in the 80's). He believes in the saying "I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine" even if it means breaking the law. By all definitions, he is a homosexual.
But not to him. He believes that homosexuals are men who dont have clout, men who are unimportant. But he is a heterosexual man who has sex with men. WOW! That was a very powerful scene. You just had to see it!

Anyway Part 2 is showing next week and I really want to see it.

well I accomplished a lot today:
I got up at 6am and I corrected my papers, I read my work for my Tuesday Psychology class.

My sis came by to collect something and my niece came with her. My niece is so precious. Apparently she has discovered Elmo. so I know what to buy for her. :)
Anyway, I saying Bye bye to her and she was waving bye bye to her mommy thinking she was saying by Auntie. But when my sis took her away, she started to cry. I was heartbroken. I dont like to see my niece cry AT ALL! But I'm sure she's fine.

Then my boyfriend came over and he brought lunch for me! So sweet! we watched TV for a while, then he had to go. I wont be seeing him this week. *sigh* But I must give him his space. These two weeks are VERY important.

Then I had an unexpected visitor. Yuh know ppl really need to call first when they come by me.They dont know what they might have been disturbing.
Dont know why they passed by, dont know what they expected. Luckily it didnt last too long.
People have just faded out of my life, people I used to spend a lot of time with. Some I miss, some I havent realised have faded away. But I think I have changed alot and maybe these ppl dont fit in with the way I am now...

bleh..who knows?

I've never met Cary in person, but she is a really good listener. I can tell her most things and she never judges me or anything. I try not to talk about my bf to her too much as she cant be with her SO right now but she listens to me never the less and I must say thanks to her for that. A new relationship is overwhelming and it's good to talk to someone.
I also like to talk to one of my longest friends D****. She listens to me too but she just broke up with her BF of 4and a half years nah, so I try not to talk too much about him to her too.
Tonight I found out that a sec school friend is in love too, so at least I can talk to her a bit. I'm glad for her. I never thought the day would come when she would fall in love yes!

anyway...One more week till the end of the school term, but next week I have two exams...keep your fingers crossed for me.

I didnt go to church today..AGAIN! I dont think I have gone for the month. Before, going to church used to be so easy for me. It was part of me. Just get up on a sunday morning and go. But now..it's hard. Part of the reason is that my church is in Diego and I live in the east, so to travel is a kinna horrors eh. But I just dont feel motivated to go to church anymore. I havent lost faith or anything. I just dont feel to do the things I usually do like participate in church events. I pray but my prayers dont last very long.
I dont want my faith in God re-energized by some tragic event like I see on TBN. I just want to be back to the stage I was at: automatically get up on a Sunday and go to church, enjoy the mass, and feel so good from church.
*sigh*

imagine I sent my mother a pic with my bf and I looking so happy...and the only thing she notices is the curtain.

*psht*

"unfaithful" turned out to be a pretty good movie. Now all I need to do is see it from the beginning. lol

I know I talk about my bf a lot but he has become a very important person in my life in a short space of time. Before I met him, I did everything for myself. i went whereever by myself, I didnt have anybody to rely on for anything much.
but with him here, well..I have a partner. I have someone to go to the grocery with, someone to go to the doctor with, someone to call whenever I feel sad.

Last night, I told him I was hungry and he brought pastelles for me. YEAH! I was in my glee! First pastelles for the season.

I guess the point I'm trying to make is that I did the "independent woman"schtick already. I still am independent yes, but I have someone to lean on as well. And it feels really good too.

:)

well..I taking in the movie "Unfaithful". I always used to wonder what the big deal was about..and I now see why.

I didnt see the first half; Iam watching the second part nah...from the part where she saw him with another woman and they still ended up having sex.

"say it"
"I want you to f*** me"

Bitch!!!

Poor Richard Gere!
He went to see the hornerman which I think is guts, but tell me, if a man show up by your door and say that he is your "gyul" husband, you wouldnt think twice, maybe thrice about letting the man in? He might have a treeline in he jacket ready to chop yuh up. well he did get it eventually... lol.

But one line that got me was when Richard ( I dont know his namein the movie nah) asked him some thing and the guy said "She told me it was your idea"

He spat out "you TALK about me?"

Dread, that line was just so .......wow!

and in the play she want to hold the man hand oui!

Poor ting!

people like to talk about how man bad and stink and dutty, but women are too eh..at least some are!

All of us have papers to mark in the staffroom, and we were just trading stories about what students wrote. For example, in Math, one of the questions was a probabilty question: what is the probabilty of size 6 occuring? The person has to get the info from a frequency table. Yuh know the student replied by answering: "probably......" Well we laff. In my spanish exam, the student has to say "I want a hot dog" which is "yo quiero un perro caliente." I got at least twice,"Yo soy un perro caliente" I am a hot dog

*sigh*

Have you ever seen love on YOUR face before? I have seen it on my bf's face, yes. I have a pic of myself and my mother when I was small and she was looking at me with love and pride in her eyes. But, for the first time, I have seen love on my face.

Last night, my bf came by me and he took some pics with a digi cam, trying hard to pose for the pic as well as hold the camera in place. He took some really nice pics.

What was amazing to see was my expression. I looked so in love. I was blown away. I looked happy, I looked smily, I even looked cute. Yes my bf was in the pic, but I was flabbergasted by how I looked.

It looked real...and it kinda sent the point home that yes, I am in love. and this is the man I'm in love with.

hee hee

*sigh*

will these exams ever end?

Here's MY list for Chrstmas:
The Lord of the Rings Trilogy (books of course)
John Mayers or Alicia Keys new CD
a few pairs of earrings ( I always lose them)

I think that's about it

I wold advise anybody to have sex with someone they love. A one night stand might be pleasurable, yes, we all aim for pleasure. But when u have sex with someone who loves you and wants only you..well the pleasure is increased. At least for me!!!

Aye, I just wanted to LARGE UP Matches and Strongy for the great artwork on this blog and the other one...

and when I FINALLY get my banner from Warren, you will dee the piece de resistance of artwork!

Thanks guys! Not only for the artwork but the listening ear as well!

I am meticulous when it comes to paying bills. I doh make joke with that. Me..I like to come home and be able to turn on my lights, talk on the phone and watch some cable, so I pay my bills on time (plus I dont want to give my mother any ammunition against me). Now thank God for paying bills in TTpost and paying using the ATM machine. It saves me the hassle of having to line up in those "other places".

Now yesterday I went to the mall to pay my TSTT bills. Surprising my phone bill was kinna low and i stayed within my stipulated 100 hours of internet usage. So I say well all I hadda to do is hand dem my LINX card and I good to go for another month.

well..not so..TSTT decides to play up in dey ass this mnth. Give the fella my internet reference number..."you owe for both October and November." I was like "EH!"
But I tell him "Just take fuh November please".

Now I am notorious for saving my ATM slips eh..some ppl crumple them up..not me..I KEEP ALL! I have watched enough Judge Judy to see how saving them things come in handy. I check my slip. right there in black and white shows where I paid both my internet and phone bill at the same time for the month of October.

4kas! Doh mess with me and the lil bit of money I get nah!!

Are you in the Christmas mood?
I'm not!

I look at the decorations in the staffroom and I steups.
Fus I bad. I put up some Christmas wreaths since last year. Yuh know I never take them down. LOL. Well at least they fit in with the time of year.

the other staffroom is so wonderfully decorated. Real nice decorations..and yuh know who decorated it? A man! Yuh see when a man can coordinate colours and decorate better than me, I does start to feel ahow yes. I does feel shame in fact.

He said decorating is his forte. He has feng shuied his desk...look ting!

Me..my desk is one of the messiest in the staffroom. 'Low me nah..it's the end of the term..nuff papers to correct.

well today was an ok day for me, ok but infuriating

Remember when u did exams in school how important they were? You made sure all your pens were writing, had all your equipment, rulers, sharpeners, paper..and most importantly, you studied?
These little wretches eh..you tell them make sure you get all things needed for the exam..yuh start to share out papers..Miss i could go in mih bag for a ruler? NO DUMMY!! ( I dont say that but I am sure that it shows on my face).

exam time is always a stressful time for me. I have supervising exams.
Most of all I hate to conduct oral exams. It sucks!

He's feeling better..I'm so glad. :)

I love him.

Yuh wouldnt believe how hard it was to tell him that the first time. It always used to stick in mih throat, or when I thought it would come out he would look away and then the lump just went away.

But then one day..it just came out! It was so weird hearing it for the first time with MY own ears. But it sounded so beautiful all the same.
There was a point in time when we said it too often, we said I love you to each other when we ended a convo.Yes we meant it, but it was a bit too often yuh know?

But after this weekend, i say it with such conviction and meaning. I know now that I dont just love the fact that he loves me. I love HIM. I LOVE him. No it's not an infatuation or I have stars in my eyes. I good.
hee hee

I advise anyone that when you tell someone that you love them, DONT be frivolous and trivial with it, because there might come a time when you might just have to prove that love..and you might fail at it.

To me, love is not just about having cool conversations and being compatible or enjoying spending time with eact other. It's about being by the person's side through thick or thin, good times and bad times; even walking through fire for this person. Are you prepared to do that? Are any of us?

This weekend I heard something that I really didnt want to nor expected to hear. But not once did I question myself and if I were doing the right thing by being with him. I was just praying that everything will work out..and it did..THANK GOD!

Love..are you ready for it

Maturity, understanding and a sense of right or wrong, time and place do not come with age nor do they come by being married,having children or attaining a university education.Some people lack the ability to look at things holistically and come to an appropriate conclusion.

I have never been one to be hesitant to admit that I am wrong, or am never afraid to see someone's else point of view.

"notorious for making oskell comments" so what? I should just be like "ok my feelings are hurt, but she always making oskell comments so I should let it slide."

How about," Ayanna, I guess you misunderstood what I said. Let me explain."

Imagine I am speaking to someone and she is insulting my bf left, right and centre..Did i get on like a bitch? No...I simply told her that I didnt like it and she stopped.
Simple.

*sigh*

a boy was caught looking at porn on a school's computer. He also peed in a container in the music room!!


but is to hear the teacher recount the story..HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA