well I think I need more imaginary drinks......

If I used to drink I might have had about three by now.

*sigh*

Jerry Orbach died. He seemed like such a cool guy eh. At least TNT is nice and have a lil thing dedicated to him.

I confess: sometimes I am a grouch. I dont feel like liming. I stay cooped up all day in my apartment with the TV on.
How?

:(

I FINALLY did my Christmas shopping. I think I did pretty well!
After that expedition I real slept, but then my bf and I went to see the Incredibles. It was a good movie. But what was most disturbing was one of the ads shown. Now the Dairy dairy ad really annoys me eh. But there was an ad for a drink, where the kids jumped into the TV and became cartoon characters. That's not so bad, but the children was 'red' but when they jumped into the TV they turned white!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Yesterday was a nice lil lime yes. I enjoyed it.

I went to a lime with some co-workers. It was really cool just sitting and ole talking yes. When I get my home I will be doing some entertaining too! It was fun!
Then I was hungry, so we went by KFC. Talk about line! But I got my cruncher special.

Time to relax a lil at home. I am going to do my shopping between tomorrow and Wednesday..hassle free!

Yesterday was rather interesting. I went to a family get -together but it wasnt my family. It was my boyfriend's. But the best part was...he didnt go! So I had to go through that all by myself. It was fun though.
I was put to sit at the old people's table, but that turned out to be the life of the party yes. There was an old lady from Spain. She had me cracking up! We spent the whole day there.
Not a bad way to spend Boxing day!

I started off Christmas day with Diarrhea. That was the worst. I was all set to go to church that morning, but I wasnt feel so well. STEUPS.

Then I arrived at my boyfriend's house. It was so good to see him after a dreadful week. He gave me a lovely watch. It was a nice quiet day yesterday.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

I have found him. I have found THE ONE.

Only someone who truly, madly, deeply loves me would be able to deal with me. I'm not saying that I am a diffcult person, but I have my moments.


Too sweet..... :D

Yesterday I went to lime with some friends from school. It was an ok lime although I dont really like Ruby Tuesdays. It was fun catching up.

This Christmas I intend to just relax and spend some time with the boyfriend. The latter part of this year was a trying one. Although I was not close to my father, death is a really difficult thing to deal with.

I'm glad some co workers of mine went to the funeral yesterday. I couldnt handle that nah. I really couldnt. :(

I babysat again today. She is a lot of work yes. Her eyes light up when she sees me eh...but there's a difference when it's her parents (understandably so).


Today is the LAST 4king day of cleaning. What I eh do today, HARD LUCK!

I couldnt do any work today because my niece was here with me!! That was a lot of fun. ANd she has a lot of energy. She was watching Wiggles and she wanted me to dance with her to every song. Then she wanted to play with her ball. Then she wanted to eat. Non stop....

I was glad when her father came for her. But she's coming back here tomorrow!
YAY!

Look at the shit this woman saying in the Sunday Express Woman's magazine:

"So I would advise that if you don't have children, don't teach," she said.

HA! I think the fact that I dont have children is an asset. I dont have a family to take care of, so I have less stress. I am more willing to stay back for after school activities;I would not be missing school so much because my child is sick or I have a parents meeting to attend.

She is talking utter crap.

I think I will write a letter to the Editor. I have connections..hee hee.

My brain was rotting away on reality TV. But I saw a great movie tonight: Mystic River. WOW!
Tim Robbins just blew me away! Sean Penn wasnt too bad. But CLINT!! He directed this masterpiece. Look at what he said at the Cannes Film Festival:

"Things just don't tidy up for me," he said. "A lot of studios didn't want to do this project. In an era where everyone wants to do the obvious thing, and follow successful films, naturally you'd make a comic book. I still like to think there's an audience for serious adult stories. I'm too old to make comic books. This wasn't 'Mystic River Reloaded.' "


I wonder what other great movie I can watch today.

I am so fed up of cleaning eh. Steups....

I went to the grocery today. I bought 420$ in groceries. If I, a single person, paid so much for groceries, imagine what I will have to pay when I have my family!That doesnt include vegetables and fruits.

Anyway, back to the cleaning...

I just watched the movie "Monster" starring Charlize Theron.
She deserved that Oscar.
She truly deserved that Oscar.

I was drawn into that movie. I was rooting for Aileen, hoping that she could have found love...at last, which is something that we all want, dont we? But her fucked up childhood got in the way and she murdered 7 men.

Because I knew who was playing the lead role of Aileen Wuornos, I was looking for some flaw in her portrayal. I mean, a pretty girl like Charlize, what does she know about playing someone so monsterlike? Charlize took on the masculine tendencies of "Lee" to a tee. I know about those 'masculine tendencies' because I read up about her after the movie. Her accent slipped every once in a while, but her portrayal in my opinion was flawless.

That movie has me feeling heavy. Watch it.

Today I was trying to not eat a lot so that I would have room to eat a full plate of food at CCN's dinner.
I couldnt make nah.Rice, pastelle, pigeon peas, chicken, fish, shrimp, turkey, garlic bread, salad. And cheesecake and fruit for dessert. YUMMY.
I realised tonight that a good meal bonds my boyfriend and I together. We have some good convos over food. hee hee.
For some strange reason, he and I were only drinking a lot of liquids. I know why now...we had a fire burning inside us. As soon as we reached home by me......well.....hotness! heh heh heh.

Tonight was really special. I loved the way he was looking at me...with such love.
I'm lucky.

I am looking forward to this Christmas. I am slowly but surely cleaning up the apartment so I'm hoping by the 21st, I should be finished. Then I can spend some time with my boyfriend, just connecting. I have no idea what to buy for him for Christmas. :s

I have a lot of thinking to do before the end of the year comes. I have lots of things to think about, mostly stuff with my father. I dont want to go into the New Year dreaming about him. I have to be studying by September 2005. That may mean that I might have to take a loan...*Sigh* I have to put my fear of failing my driving test behind me. Develop a better attitude towards my students and my teaching. See? Lots of thinking.

Evey morning I watch Playhouse Disney. There is an Austrailian children's show called The Wiggles. My niece loves that show because of the cute songs, but out of the four guys, there are two that have caught my eye...the one that wears the blue shirt and the one that wears the yellow shirt. I'm sure they get lots of chicks. Not only are they good looking, but they are good with children. What woman wouldnt want that? hee hee.

I AM ON VACATION!
YAY!

And look at the time I am up...steups.
Today is a DO NOTHING day. Just staying home and watching TV. There will be an imprint of my ass on that couch.

I forgot my anniversary!
Shame on me.
Thanks for reminding me, baby!
:)

One more day of school and that's it for me.

I went to work late only to realise that I missed a staff meeting. There was a prayer session going on for Onika Bostic and a few other people.
After that, I went with a friend of mine to run an errand. Then we went back to school. The meeting for 12:30pm was cancelled and that means that I have to reach for 9am. STEUPS.
I got a drop from my friend home and that was my day.

At the end of my last post, my editor-in-chief said that the last line 'I hate this' doesnt make any sense.
What I was referring was the tragedies that have happened of late. I really hate that. I am trying not to let fear grip me as it has been for the past couple of weeks. I need have faith.
Life is a precious thing and I am not going to waste it.

I guess from reading my posts, it is evident that I was very very frustrated. Mostly it was work and that transferred to my relationship. My bf was working not only on his coursework assignments, but assignments for his job as well. And all I was doing was adding to his stress.
For that, I am truly sorry.

But today was like us starting anew. My heart is just bursting with love for him.

We tried Quiznos tonite. It was good, really good. But it's not something we are going to try in a hurry again. The best part was the bathroom. I could have stayed in there forever. There was potpourri all around. It smelt heavenly.

I was very shocked to hear the news about Onika Bostic, just like everyone else. I dont know her, but her sister works with me. Just last night we were all dancing and having a nice time. Now she has to deal with all this.

I just called my brother to make sure he is ok. I dont worry too much about my sister because she has a good husband. I pray for my mother and I am glad when she calls, even though is to boff me sometimes. I am looking at my boyfriend right now, sleeping. He's snoring (hee hee), but it doesnt bother me.

I hate this. :(

$200 down the drain yes.
I tried.

:(

I find myself watching a lot of playhouse disney shows. They are so cute and really educational. I would definitely let my child look at those shows.

I'm hungry

:(

bleh
bleh
bleh


*sigh*

SCHOOL CLOSE!
YAY!

I took my time and went to school because I didnt have to take roll or anything. As soon as I walk in school, I saw a student of mine in plain clothes. He was sent home immediately. But he came back. There was a Christmas programme but I didnt get to see any because a parent came to see me.
She is experiencing frustration with her son's father. It seems like he is saying bad things about the stepfather, which is encouraging the son to disrespect the stepfather. At the end of the meeting, she was in tears. I dont like to see mothers cry.

One thing I liked is that the food came ON TIME. I was disappointed in the servings but it was ok for $15. We had snacks galore anyway. One student's father makes CHEESECAKE! WOW.
The children ate, danced, played football. They had a nice time. As usual, I had the beggars. But I had enough to share. I must say this class party was the least stressful because I had the help of a parent, plus the food came boxed already. So all I had to do was hand out food. yippee!

I am almost finished correcting papers. One more batch to go. So on Monday, I will be putting in marks.

Death is on my mind a lot.
Every little pain I get, I think I have some kind of disease or some kind of cancer. I worry about my family, if they are healthy or safe. I worry about my boyfriend to the point where I think I am nagging him.

With my father's death, I had to prepare myself for it. Everytime the phone rang, I always thought it was THE phonecall. I was relieved when it wasnt. Thing is, he had to suffer. Despite all the shit he did, I wouldnt have wanted him to die the way that he did, and it still makes me sad, even as I type this. He died in the hospital, alone, kinda like how he lived his life.

Now with Darryn's death, in no way, form or fashion was I prepared for that. He wasnt my closest friend, but I will never forget that Christmas he called me when I was all alone. He died on an operating table from all reports. That shit is just fucked up.

*sigh*

I just want to sleep.

I was not able to go to work yesterday because that damn cold knocked me out. I wasnt able to go to work at all. Luckily my boyfriend was able to bring some stuff for me to feel better. He so schweet!

I was struggling in work today, but I have some very supportive co-workers..never mind I was coughing and sneezing up the place. I hope I dont cough all over the people children when I am examining them tomorrow.

I got some bad news today.

Someone I know was killed..for his car. Thing is, the thief was already in the car, but he told him to drive then a few mins later, shot him. What was the point really? Why shoot him? Just take the fucking car nah.
Why kind of animal could just look at someone and shoot him...FOR HIS OWN CAR?


I can only imagine what his family is going through right now.....

I need some rest!

I got the cold just so out of the blue. I am coughing, I am achy...it's the worst.
My neighbour is cooking something that smells really awful and I feel like vomitting.
Today sucks.

I feel alone and ignored.

I know exactly what my problem is. I expect people to reciprocate too much.
I think about your feelings so you think about mine.
Maybe I shouldnt expect that....
Maybe I shouldnt expect anything yes.
Cyah get disappointed.

*sigh*

I need some sleep.

I only felt one earthquake today. I heard there were more than one. I was sleeping for the last two.

FUCK!

I did the math - over 500 papers to mark. STEUPS

Thank goodness I have some students to help me.

If it's one thing I am developing in teaching is some backbone yes. I always have to keep in mind that I cant take what these children do personally. It's hard, really hard, because they can be mean. But they dont directly affect my life. In every class I teach there must be one person that I reach. So all is not lost.

Big up to my boyfriend. Good going on your coursework assignments!
I'm very proud of you.
*muah*